Perfection at it's best
by SoRightItsWrong
Summary: Maybe they only wanted it because they couldn't have it.


**A/N **Hey guys! Here's a short one-shot. It's pretty confusing at parts but I'm hoping you'll get it! It skips back and forth between Casey and Derek. But I never really say who is who.

I love reviews. Just nothing mean please! Criticism is always welcome however.

Also I'm putting this at Teen. But there are a few Mature sentences. Tell me if you think I need to change the rating!

_You promised me you had no heart. I knew from the beginning you were a liar. _

You look at me one day. And you fucking ruin my life. I want to hate you. (I did hate you.) But the look in your eyes made me feel something. And I hate how I love you. (But how could it be any other way?)

I don't know how long I've wanted this. Sometimes I think it's been forever. And I look at the wall between us (separating us) and I can almost feel you on the other side. And maybe if I just put my hand up to it I can touch you. Know who you are. Make you believe in me. (Make you want me.)

Here's something really bad. I think I want you more because of who you are. It's _wrongandsoright _but I can't help it. But when you look at me, you see. (And I know that you know.)

___

_I almost want to change who I am for you… But not enough to actually do it._

You know you can hurt me so much with just one look don't you? So why don't you punish me for it? (Cause I'm so bad for wanting what I can't take.) But don't think, I don't realize that you want it to. You're just better at covering it up. (And you think you're to fucking good for me don't you?) Well don't worry baby. You don't need to throw away your morals for me. Because it's only a matter of time before I take anyways.

And I think I'm starting to resent you. (It's not love I'm feeling, I promise myself.) Cause I know everything about you. (And doesn't it burn love, that the one you hate the most, knows you best?) But you just won't give in. (Even though you know that every bit of wrong will taste so good.)

It disgusts you doesn't it? These feelings you have for me? I know you've always been that good little girl. You think you know the difference between right and wrong. (But we've always been that right kind of wrong haven't we darling?)

And you know it's bad, but you want to feel me inside you. (And maybe I'll want to scream your name…but I won't.)

___

_I think sometimes about the past. You never used to damage me like you do now. _

And I know you're trying to hurt me. (It's possible that sometimes I think about letting go.) But I won't end this and you know it. Because it's a game that I'm not willing to lose (to you.)

But I want you to know it's not denial. (It's just the truth.) I won't let myself do this. Because it's not fucking right. So go ahead and try to hurt me. You know I can hear through that thin wall that's separating us. The screams and slams are something I've become used to. (And just because there are tears sliding silently down my face doesn't mean a damn thing.)

Maybe you don't realize just how thin the walls are. Because I hear you in there… whispering my name when you come.

___

_You said it was the same difference. And that's when I knew there was no turning back._

It's probably not fair to you. (But I want this so damn much and I'm not willing to lose.) And it's really your own damn fault for challenging me. You knew that I couldn't stop the wanting. And how am I supposed to resist when it's you? (It's almost ironic because I always get what I want… Even if it's you, my dear sweet sister.)

Do you realize even if you apologize I'm still going to break you? (The cards are all laid out on the table sweetheart. And it's too late for you.) Because you pushed and you pulled and you made me want to be something (everything.)

You know all those nameless girls have something you don't. (It's called courage my dear.) And maybe they don't go breaking my name just the way I like it. Or have just the right amount of silky brown hair to grab onto.

But I can almost imagine if I close my eyes, that it's you under me, screaming my name. (And it's perfection at its best.)

___

_Somehow the silence is worse. Because at least before I knew you wanted me._

I'm almost positive you hate me now. (But then again maybe it's always been that way.)You punish me more than you used to. You make me meet _them_. And they all have brown hair and blue eyes. (It's sick and I know it, but I'm suddenly happy because you can't hate me, if they all look like me.)

But last night you called me 'my dear sister'. And your eyes are indifferent now when you look at me. (I shouldn't break like this just because of you.)

I know it's wrong but when I go to bed I dream of you. You're over me, chanting my name. And my legs are wrapped around your waist and I'm screaming for more. (Because once I have just a little bit I can't stop.)

Is it wrong when I wake up that I just want to go back to that dream? I'm happy there, because I'm with you.

___

_Pretending is just part of the game. And I know you're so damn scared that I don't want you anymore._

He's getting tired of covering the need in his eyes. (And he really wants to erase that scared look in hers.)

She doesn't think he wants her anymore. (But then it changes.)

And suddenly she's under him breaking his name. And he's whispering hers over and over.

___

They know that they've crossed the line. (But it wasn't like there were any clear warnings.) And maybe they should have thought it through first. But crossing lines is all they do. (And it's always been slightly translucent and hard to see, so you shouldn't blame them.)

He wanted and he took. And she wanted and gave herself up. (They say it's all part of the game but they aren't so sure anymore.)

It almost scares them… because somehow neither lost. (They both got what they wanted. For once.)


End file.
